Give the gift of a clutter-free home

This is a loaded topic, but since it’s December, I’m going to take on holiday gift-giving. Gulp.

My approach to gift giving has dramatically changed since I’ve become a professional organizer. Why? Because gifts are one of the biggest clutter challenges for my clients.

I don’t really like this, but it was a gift and I feel guilty about letting go of it.

I don’t want this, but my Mom gave it to me and I’m afraid she’ll ask about it the next time she comes over.

Someone bought me this expensive item, but it’s just not my style.

These are sentiments I hear from clients over and over. After I saw how often gifts the clients not only didn’t give them joy, they actually created a negative effect of adding guilt, stress, and clutter, I realized I needed to change my personal approach to holiday gifting. I want to shared what I’ve learned with you in the hopes that you’ll feel more confident both as a gift-giver and recipient.

Sooo many gifts…

How did we get here?

First of all, I want to say that this post isn’t about being a Grinch or not giving gifts. I love giving gifts and a world without gifts would be a sad one.

At the same time, we live in a culture where there is an incredible pressure to buy lots of gifts, particularly around Christmas. So much so that 47% of Americans surveyed expect to go into debt for holiday gift-giving, travel, or both, this year. And so many people are already overwhelmed with belongings. Eleven percent of Americans rent storage units to store extra stuff.

Now that I see much stress gifts create for both givers and receivers, I think its time for a different approach to gifts.

Realize the change starts with you

Before we get into strategies, it’s important to acknowledge that you only have control over your own gift giving behavior.

Yup, that’s right. You can’t stop your mother-in-law or your aunt Suzy from wrapping up LOL dolls or vanilla-scented candles if that’s the way they are hell-bent on showing their love.

I often hear my younger clients say things like “I ask my parents to gift my kids experiences like museum tickets, but they just keep buying plastic toys.”

Honestly, I’m not surprised by that. Buying tons of stuff to show our families that we love them at certain times of the year has become so culturally ingrained that many people feel it’s mandatory. And for gift givers, gifting something intangible is a change from the tradition of handing someone a wrapped box. It’s going to take a bigger cultural change before more people feel comfortable gifting differently.

Over the years, I’ve realized that although I can’t change other people’s behaviors around gifting, I can change the way I give gifts.

How I’ve changed my approach to gifting

Before I became an organizer, I felt obligated to buy holiday gifts for every party and event I went to. At times, I fell into the trap of buying things I liked or that seemed really nice to me (like an expensive pair of earrings or bottle of wine) but the recipient didn’t actually care about. Other times, I found gifts that I knew were lame, but I bought them anyway because I didn’t want to show up empty-handed, or I couldn’t afford what the person really wanted.

I don’t do those things anymore. I’ve tried to be a more mindful gift-giver by:

• Opting out of gift exchanges that are less meaningful to me, or where I can’t gift a specific recipient, like office Secret Santas or Yankee Swaps.

• Pausing and asking “Am I picking this item to impress the recipient, or because they will really love it?” If I’m picking something to show off my own taste, I rein myself in.

• Buying and giving gifts whenever I find the right one, regardless of if there’s a holiday or occasion. That way, I don’t feel pressure to buy something that’s not great just because it’s a holiday.

• Giving cash in a nice greeting card. It’s not the most exciting gift to give, but I’ve never heard someone say they didn’t like cash.

More ideas for clutter-free gifting

If you love giving gifts, but the people on your list already seem to have everything (or say “I don’t need anything”), you can still gift in a way that’s clutter-free.

My fellow NAPO organizer Kimberly Corey recently wrote a great blog post full of clutter-free gift ideas, including everything from concert tickets to car detailing (Santa, if you’re reading this, I’d love to have someone detail my truck :)

In addition to all of Kimberly’s great ideas, another intangible gift I love is a gift subscription to an online publication so your loved one can read articles without the paywall.

What about gift cards?

Gift cards can be tricky. Some people love them, but many of them go unused or end up with a balance.

I think a gift card to a retailer you know the recipient regularly shops with or to a restaurant you know they love (or would love to try) is a great gift. Otherwise, I would go with cash.

I have had more and more clients ask for organizing gift cards over the years, so I do offer several organizing gift cards. These are a great option if your loved one already works with me, or has expressed interest in working with a professional organizer. (Otherwise, it might seem passive aggressive.)

The greatest gift

It may seem cliche, but never underestimate the gift of your time and presence. Calling a friend, spending an afternoon with your parents, engaging in something silly with your kids…these are the gifts they will truly cherish.

I wish you a wonderful and joyful holiday season!